


Poison and Wine

by stellarwrites



Category: Winner (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Music, F/M, Fluff, Romance, School
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-05-11
Updated: 2020-08-15
Packaged: 2021-03-03 05:28:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 17,641
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24129703
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/stellarwrites/pseuds/stellarwrites
Summary: Kang Seungyoon is the musically-gifted lead vocalist of rising rock band WINNER, who possesses a voice and ambition that is meant to take him to superstardom.Kim Sejeong is a piano prodigy from the age of seven and is raised to become the heiress of the family fortune. Her safe, predictable future has been set from the beginning.Their paths weren't meant to cross, but the school's annual year-end showcase puts them on each other's paths.When the resident rock rebel and the top piano student are forced to work together, they have no idea how they will change each other's lives.
Relationships: Kang Seungyoon/Kim Sejeong, Kang Seungyoon/Song Minho | Mino
Comments: 39
Kudos: 62





	1. Chapter One

O love, as long as love you can,

O love, as long as love you may,

The time will come, the time will come

When you will stand at the grave and mourn.

\- Ferdinand Freiligrath, _O lieb, so lang du lieben kannst_ (1845)(S.H. transl.)

**One**

The first time Kang Seungyoon sees her is during after school hours. She is all alone in the cavernous recital hall, playing a sweet, haunting tune. Later, she would share with him that it was Erik Satie’s _Gymnopedie No.1_ , and she only plays it when she's particularly sad. But at this moment, he hasn't yet earned her trust, nor her smiles. They are still strangers to each other. 

Kim Sejeong is a piano prodigy, one of their school's brightest talents. God Sejeong, they call her. She lives in a big house down the main street, bordered with high walls. In this already highly-competitive school, everyone talks about how insanely talented she is, but he has never heard her play until now. Piano isn't really Seungyoon's thing. 

Or so he had thought.

He doesn't realize that he has already put down his knapsack and sat down on one of the plush red seats. The recital hall is entirely empty, save for Kim Sejeong's lonely music. 

She ignores him, or maybe she has yet to realize she has an unwilling, captive audience. She is completely lost in her playing, her fingers simultaneously caressing and flying across the ivory keys. Back hunched, shoulders pitched forward, as if she has an intimate secret to share with the piano before her. Her eyes are closed.

Seungyoon closes his eyes too, leans back on the seat. The music washed over him, like warm rain. This felt like an interlude, a respite. 

Later he would come home to his mom, quietly crying over the bills again. She is careful not to let him see her tears, but he knows. He has repeatedly offered to quit the school to start working, but his mother had flown into a rage he has never seen before--his sweet mother barely raises her tone. _You have a gift,_ she had said, _not all have been blessed by your voice. You must make the most out of it._

Seungyoon wishes he had been blessed by other talents, instead of his voice. Maybe something to do with a knack for making money or for getting out of trouble. Or a talent for not caring too much.

It's just one of _those_ days. When the constant rehearsing, studying, and working takes a toll, and everything weighs twice as heavy on Seungyoon's mind. His voice hasn't been great lately. Mino's complaining about his lack of focus in the studio. 

Seungyoon feels like a mouse on a wheel, tirelessly spinning and spinning and spinning but nowhere to go.

Because what would happen after graduation? Would he really be able to make music? Make the band happen in Seoul? Or end up as a cubicle pen-pusher in some nameless company?

Ahh, but he shouldn't think of that now. That can wait. Right now, he's here sitting on one of the velvet seats, listening to a wistful piano melody. The dulcet sound gave Seungyoon permission to rest for a little while.

Suddenly, a sharp ping pierces the tranquility.

He cringes hard and quickly fishes his back pocket to put his phone in silent mode. The notification on the lock screen showed Song Mino's rapid-fire messages--

  
  


From SONG MINO: 

[Seunyoonie] 

[wru?]

[class about to start. get your ass over here]

  
  


\--and looks back at the stage to see her glaring at him while her fingers continue their languid dance over the keys. It's an impressive feat. Her knife-like stare is direct and unapologetic. Impossible to look away.

_She's pretty,_ Seungyoon realizes with a jolt. How come he'd never notice before?

For a second, he debates whether he'd approach her and apologize, but she's already released him from her glower. 

The music piece comes to its abrupt denouement, the final note ringing in the air. Without another look at his direction, Kim Sejeong begins to pick up her music sheets. Her long dark hair falls to hide her face as she tidies up. 

He blinks as if a spell was broken. She pointedly ignores him, even though he’s sure that she knows that she had a single entranced audience of one. 

Seungyoon hasn't spoken to her ever, he thinks. Their social circles are on the opposite ends of the spectrum. People around Kim Sejeong are usually made up of the talented and moneyed kind. Seungyoon's choice of crowd are the talented riffraff-made-scholars. Their groups simply don't have a reason to mingle. 

Maybe he should say something, to be polite? Apologize? He did disturb her practice a little bit. 

Or maybe just to hear her talk?

_Don't be an idiot._

But before he could open his mouth again, the girl doesn't spare him another opening. Kim Sejeong has already grabbed her bag and folder and exits the stage, lightning-quick. A friend has been waiting for her at the side exit, and they both disappear.

Curious that she seems to have taken the light and warmth with her. Seungyoon suppresses a shiver. 

He sits back down, perturbed with his encounter with the school's star piano student. Listening to her play was like wading inside a half-dream. And now he's back on shore, wondering if he imagined it all. Her music made him forget everything for a while. Not a lot of things can do that to Kang Seungyoon, except in the fiery throes of writing a song. Or perhaps sex.

What's with Kim Sejeong?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Erik Satie - Gymnopedie No. 1 - https://youtu.be/2WfaotSK3mI
> 
> \--
> 
> Hello. The summer heat and the extended quarantine got me good. This is my first fic so please be gentle.
> 
> I tried to do my research as best as I could, but I am not a music student/musician so any mistake I make, I apologize in advance (pls just let it go for the sake of the story hahahuhu)
> 
> Tags will be updated as the story progresses. Will probably be updated 2-3x a week.
> 
> Some bits of info might be inspired by real-life, but this story is firmly FICTION.
> 
> Enjoy and please leave a kudos or comment if you are inclined :)
> 
> \- @ksystellar on Twitter


	2. Chapter Two

Two

“Was that Kang Seungyoon staring at you for your entire encore performance?” Kang Mina nudges her as they walked out of the recital hall’s back exit. 

Sejeong feels the heat climb to her cheeks but manages an expert eye roll. “He wasn’t staring, his eyes were closed.”

“Aha.” Mina spins her around to look at her knowingly. “I got two things from that--first you know who he was.”

“Everyone knows who he is.” It’s true. Kang Seungyoon’s rough and dark baritone has been the subject of many of her music major friends.  _ Female _ friends. His vocal and guitar audition for the scholarship is still talked about by most of the hard-to-please vocal coaches who had witnessed it.

It doesn’t help that Kang Seungyoon has that intriguing mixture of take-me-home-to-meet-your-mother-good-boy vibe and I-will-eff-you-up-before-you-realize-it bad boy vibe. He’s not unruly, nor he causes trouble in school (at least, as far as Sejeong knows), but it’s well known that he could strip you of your week’s allowance if you bet against him on billiards. Many of the male seniors have already complained. 

He smokes, and he is known to cut classes once in a while. But he’s reasonably polite with teachers and other students--except to her, apparently. 

With a scowl, Sejeong remembers his phone pinging in the middle of her piece. It’s her one free time in this entire day that she gets to play something that she wants, and the guy ruins it.

Good boy? Bad boy? Sejeong guesses that with Kang Seungyoon, you never know what you’re going to get. Not that she has any interest in knowing more about him, of course.

“Uh-huh.” Mina nods innocently. “Want to know my second point?”

“Not particularly.”

“My second point was you knew he closed his eyes the entire time you were playing. So you snuck a look and couldn’t help yourself!”

“His freaking phone went off while I was playing. How could I have ignored him?”

“Why? You do that all the time,” Mina continues to talk over her. “You ignore your dad, you ignore your grandmother, you ignore me--”

“I don’t ignore you!” Sejeong protests. Her dad and grandmother, perhaps--

“Only during recital week, and I can forgive you because that’s just straight-up student abuse legalized by our educational system,” Mina sighs. “Do you know your final piece yet?”

“I haven’t decided.” The end of term recital and showcase were the two most important activities of the Busan Conservatory of Music. Usually, representatives from national and foreign universities come to watch seniors and try to entice them to audition for their post-grad courses.

“Dr. Song wants me to try playing Liszt.” She remembers what he said:  _ My dear, play Rachmaninoff if you want to stay in Korea. Liszt, if you decide to go to Europe. It’s all in your hands. _

_ That’s _ why she hasn’t decided.

“I, for one, can’t tell if your mentor adores you or wants to kill you.” Mina shakes her head. She throws her arm around Sejeong’s shoulder. “You  _ do _ know I’ve booked you for my solo, right?”

“Of course.” Mina is a cello major and has already written the contract (in figurative blood) that Sejeong will be her accompanist for her solo performance.

Mina giggles. “Jieun will be jealous. She’s been after you to be her accompanist.”

“No, she’s not.” Sejeong corrects her. “Remember she’s dating that composition major. I’m sure he’ll accompany her voice solo.” 

Mina snorts. “Don’t be silly, she’s not dating Song Mino. That was just a one-night… thing.”

“Oh.” Sejeong is never the one to judge when it comes to her friends’ dating lives. Everyone knows that Song Mino doesn’t do girlfriends.

And Song Mino is a member of Kang Seungyoon’s infamous band, called WINNER. They have two other members who graduated last year, Lee Seunghoon and Kim Jinwoo. 

They’ve already made waves in school because of their experimental rock take on 90’s grunge, hip-hop, and Classical Music. Most of the student body adores it, but the teachers were more… disapproving. Not that the four members care. 

As for Sejeong, no one needs to know her secret WINNER playlist on Spotify. 

Strangely, WINNER in her mind is disconnected from the reality that she’s classmates with two of the members. Three if you count the band manager. She likes their music and appreciates their original work. As far as she’s concerned, the school has nothing more to contribute to the band's rise.

But as for Kang Seungyoon…

She has trouble connecting WINNER’s music to the… man. Thinking of Kang Seungyoon as a living, breathing male does something to her insides that she chooses to ignore.

Being the sole focus of his attention is unnerving. As if a hundred eyes were looking at Sejeong at the same time. Usually, she erects a facade between her and the audience while she plays. But his stare feels like he wants to unravel her on stage. She is caught off guard. 

“He did look sorry when you stared daggers at him,” Mina giggles. “Poor boy didn’t know what hit him. He gave you his infamous fox-like eyes, didn’t you even notice?”

She remembers the moment when he seems to want to say something--and her instinct was to pack up twice as fast.  _ Run, run, run.  _

And besides, what would she even say to WINNER’s leader? That’s right, they have nothing to say to each other, maybe except point out that he was rude. Even with that ridiculous fox-like pair of eyes. Damn it, she noticed.

“No, I didn’t notice.” Sejeong sighs, putting WINNER and Kang Seungyoon off her mind. “Come on, we’ll be late for our next class.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [Sergei Rachmaninoff](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U6MjjfIHA1M&list=PLfHsXkGpxmDOCJpRcR5MtDYj9VtRe1lG0&index=1)   
>  [Franz Liszt](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0rj0gG7bJCg&list=PLd6xcdi0iv1EwufrfcjndfZH6j69q4FcY&index=1)
> 
> It's a double update week, as a thank you to the lovely people who generously took the time to give me kudos and comments. I wish you all light and peace :) See you on the next chapter.


	3. Chapter Three

**Three**

The classroom buzzed with animated chatter as Seungyoon sat on his seat. Mr. Park isn’t even in yet. Damn Mino doesn’t mind being late to everything but hates waiting for Seungyoon every time.

Mino claps his back. “Where the fuck have you been?”

“Got detained,” Seungyoon said vaguely, not wanting to explain further. He glances at Kwon Hyunjung to his right, giving him a fist bump.

Hyunjung is Seungyoon’s best mate since grade school days and the current WINNER band manager. They are neighbors, one floor apart. They’ve seen the best and worst of each other’s situation. As a child, Hyunjung stays over every time his mother works overtime, or when his father was drunk. Both of them turned to music for solace, united with their taste for 80’s synth, 90’s grunge music, and Bach. 

Mino became Seungyoon’s friend because their studio booths were adjacent to each other. When one stays up until 4 AM in school, you quickly learn who is taking Composition very seriously. Mino’s influences were mainly hip-hop, and it proves to lend a refreshing flavor when it clashes with classical. When it comes to music and life, they give it to each other straight.

Seungyoon couldn’t help but miss the other two, Lee Seunghoon and Kim Jinwoo, who both graduated last year. 

While they haven’t gone their separate ways, it is harder to make music while two of the composing members and the band manager were still in school. Jinwoo and Seunghoon left for Seoul a few months ago, to start scouting for record companies that can sign them. 

Still, it’s not the same when they’re apart. It’s a relief that Seungyoon and Mino can join them in Seoul after they graduate, and step on the gas pedal they’ve been dying to push.

Less than a year left… Seungyoon muses. His eyes involuntarily drift to where Kim Sejeong sits. They've been classmates for almost the entire year, but she has managed to escape his notice. How come?

Her hair is up in a haphazard bun now. Her fingers tap incessantly on her notebook as her friends idly chat away around her. 

“You look… something.” Mino observes. He follows Seungyoon’s line of gaze. “Why are you staring at God Sejeong?”

Seungyoon looked back at Mino, playing it cool. “You know her?”

“Everyone knows her,” Mino scoffs. “She’s the only one who made Dr. Song crack a smile during last year’s recital. The last one to do it was Kim Dasol.”

He nods like he doesn’t particularly care, but of course, Mino knows better. He narrows his eyes. “Why? What about her?”

Seungyoon decides to come clean. “Nothing. I just saw her play for the first time before coming in. I thought it was all hype,” At Mino’s raised eyebrows, he explains in a rush “--Oh fuck off, you know what I mean with the rich kids in this school. Money over talent, blah blah.”

Before Mino can retort, Mr. Park sweeps in with a flourish, his trademark colorful scarf burning Seungyoon’s eyes as he favors more muted sensibilities when it comes to color. 

A rollcall of students followed. Only twenty-five can make the cut in this Applied Music Masterclass. It’s a mix of students from first-year students to senior level. As long as you make the grade, you can take this class. It’s one of the more competitive courses in the school. Of course, the three of them wanted in.

He thinks back to how lonely Kim Sejeong appears on stage, wielding the sad, slow music using her delicate wrists. 

A random, rueful tune flits in his mind. Hmm. Seungyoon thinks about taking out his phone to do a quick voice memo when a volley of protests breaks his concentration.

Seungyoon looks up to see the students complaining to Mr. Park, and the poor man tries to calm everyone down.

“What’s up?”

“Mr. Park just announced that aside from our solo performance, he wants us to do a duet for the showcase,” Mino said with a defeated sigh.

Seungyoon shrugs. “I can do vocals for you if you want.”

He shakes his head. “Random partners, bud. We’re picking a name from that fishbowl.” 

Ah. That explains why everyone is up in arms. 

Picking a partner requires careful and deliberate strategy: said partner must be a match when it comes to skills, attitude, and schedule. Lucky if you get two out of three with a partner you choose. But leaving it up to fate?

“--It’s a way to foster better relations between music majors! No, Ms. Lee, you cannot pick again--”

“We _are_ cliquish.” Hyunjung conceded. “When was the last time you hung out with someone who wasn’t a vocal major?”

“Yesterday.” Mino and Seungyoon answer at the same time.

Hyunjung rolled his eyes. “Making out doesn’t count.”

Before Seungyoon could protest, Mr. Park calls his name so he can pick from the fishbowl.

Where does one buy a fishbowl, Seungyoon wonders as he moves towards the front of the class. He walks past where Kim Sejeong sits. Her face rests elegantly underneath her hand, expression far away from here. Uninterested. 

Seungyoon sticks his hand inside and fishes out a strip of hastily-folded paper. Somehow, he already knows what the name would be before he unfolded it. Mr. Park gets the paper from him and reads the name, sealing his fate. 

“Ah, excellent. Kang Seungyoon’s partner is Kim Sejeong.” 

Kim Sejeong’s startled eyes meet his.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yay, they're now in one room. :)) I didn't think of myself as a slow burn writer but 🤷
> 
> A double update! I know. This won't be the usual drill but I figured I could just go ahead and share these as a thank you to the lovely early kudos-givers and commenters. I wish you light and peace <3 
> 
> Next update should be no later than May 18.
> 
> P.S. Kwon Hyunjung is an original character. I just liked the idea of Seungyoon not losing touch with his Busan friends :))


	4. Chapter Four

** FOUR **

An excited murmur breaks in class.

Seungyoon goes back to his seat, not daring to look at her direction again. Mr. Park moves on to another student’s name. 

Mino eyes Seungyoon interestedly while Hyunjung rattles off his opinion on his draw. 

“You lucky dog. Kim Sejeong is probably the top piano major in our school. Maybe the city. She placed first in the winter showcase last year, and she’s the only undergraduate invited to play in the classical preshow for Busan Music Festival--”

“It means shit all if she turns out to be a diva,” Mino mutters. Seungyoon agrees though he doesn’t know anything about the girl he met yesterday, save for her cold stare and their weird standoff.

In general, he doesn’t hang out with a lot of piano majors. They’re usually known as too formal, a touch rigid, and not very fun--compared to say the percussion crowd.

Mr. Park gives them the last fifteen minutes of class to confer with their partner. Mino ruffles Seungyoon’s hair in sympathy as he goes to consult with his partner--another composition major. Hyunjung is paired up with another vocal major. 

Seungyoon silently curses both their retreating backs.

He walks to where the girl sits. One of her friends gets up to leave, but not without an impish smile in his direction. He knows her face, but they haven’t been introduced. 

Ah, she’s the friend from the recital hall. He politely returns her smile.

Seungyoon turns his full attention to her. In broad daylight, it’s the first time he’s had a good, long look at her: tip-tilted eyes, delicate features. Her unexpected generous mouth offsets what could have been a typical pretty face. It makes him want to look at her more, to study what’s so interesting about her,

  
  


Kim Sejeong looks at him steadily but says nothing, her expression decidedly neutral. Some strands from her long, fine, brown hair have fallen to her shoulders. 

Well, this is awkward as hell. Seungyoon decides to fake it ‘til he makes it to the end of the allotted fifteen minutes. 

He starts to introduce himself, but to his surprise--she talks first.

“Kang Seungyoon.” Her gaze is direct and disarming. No blush, no high-pitched cooing

Seungyoon ignores the little thrill he feels when she says his name. He returns the gesture, almost formally. “Kim Sejeong.”

They tentatively size each other up. It is a unique tension, the kind that Seungyoon plans to examine later. He knows it's not flirtatious or coy between them--at least not yet. Just mutual, polite regard for each other. 

It’s a relief. Or maybe she is just tolerant, and it’s all only in Seungyoon’s imagination.

Kim Sejeong raises her eyebrows expectantly. He realizes he had been staring. 

Get a grip.

“About earlier,” Seungyoon clears his throat. “I’m sorry about disturbing your practice with my phone.”

“Accepted.” She says readily. Her expression doesn’t change.

He tries again with honesty. “You play well.”

“Thank you.” A quirk threatens the edges of her mouth, but a smile doesn’t happen. 

She gestures for Seungyoon to sit beside her. Kim Sejeong is remarkably poised and self-composed, her energy contained. So unlike the girl he saw playing to herself with abandon inside the recital hall.

He wills himself to focus. “So, what are we playing for the showcase?”

“I haven’t worked with a string major before. What is your second instrument after the classical guitar?” She asks politely. Her voice is throaty and warm, a complete opposite of her icy demeanor.

“Violin. But it needs a lot of work. Apparently, I’m too old to learn the proper posture.”

She scoffs. “The old geezers really have nothing better to do in their spare time but find ways how to gatekeep this school.”

She sounds irritated. _For me?_ Seungyoon wonders, but then crushes the thought. “Anyway, I’m better with the guitar. What’s your second instrument?”

She hesitates. “Voice. But I’m more comfortable with the piano. Obviously.”

“I can do vocal for the showcase,” Seungyoon replies, mentally thinking of how to convince her to sing for him as soon as possible. “But I’d rather pick the song.”

She easily agrees. “Just give me your usual sheets so I can learn them before our next practice. You’re a baritone, right? I’ve already had some experience with Schubert and Duparc.”

The usual student would negotiate, perhaps pick a piece that would make sure her skills would be highlighted. But not Kim Sejeong. Because she’s just that confident that whatever piece is chosen, she’s not going to drown alongside a vocalist. Even one as skilled as Seungyoon.

Her quiet confidence intrigues him.

“I was thinking of making a more contemporary arrangement for the duet.” He already has a song list in mind.

“Contemporary,” Sejeong repeats like he just said a foreign word. Or a dirty one.

“Is there something wrong with that?” Seungyoon asks patiently. Classical pianists.

“Not exactly wrong.” She pauses, gathering her thoughts. Seungyoon could hear the unspoken but. “It’s just doing the usual classical piece is a sure pass for the both of us.”

“I like living on the edge.”

“I like keeping my GPA where it’s at.” She says flatly. _Temper, temper._

Seungyoon holds back his smile. He rests his chin on his one hand and looks at her lazily. “Look. Our solo performances are already classical. Everyone knows we’re going to nail it. It would be more interesting, more impactful to show another side during a showcase, don’t you think?”

Kim Sejeong crosses her arms, but she’s deep in thought. At least she appears to be considering it. A small crease forms in between her eyebrows. His eyes stray to it before landing on her face again.

He leans in, pressing on her hesitation. “Tell you what, for our next meeting, let’s come up with a list of songs that we want to play, and then come to a compromise.”

“Fine with me.” He notices the obstinate set of her jaw and the prideful way she holds her neck. It makes him think of wicked things.

Batting the thought away, Seungyoon abruptly takes out his phone. “I need to get your number.”

She blinks at him. “My number?”

Seungyoon musters all the acting talent that he remembers from Drama class - Freshman year. Project innocence, a touch confused. “So we can coordinate our schedules?”

Nothing to do about gaining direct contact with her. Nope. 

“Oh of course.” She rattles it off and tells him not to share her number because of security reasons. He remembers the high walls of her house and the Mercedes Benz E-class car that picks her to and from school. He understands her concerns.

And besides, Seungyoon knows that it will never happen. He’s not sharing her number with anyone else for sure.

He inputs his number on her phone and hands it back to her. “My number is sacred, by the way. Only my inner circle knows that one.”

“Doesn’t half of the school already know your number?”

Seungyoon stills. 

He’s aware of this… _prejudice_ against him and the band. It’s not that they’re troublemakers per se. But in this incredibly uptight school, they might as well are. They smoke, they cut classes, they occasionally toe the line when it suits them. Most of the faculty and snobby students are eager to relegate the “bad crowd” moniker to the scholars like them. More so with WINNER.

Most of the time, he’s over it. Today, it annoys him. 

That mutual respect he thought he felt a moment ago? It’s just Seungyoon’s imagination after all. 

Is that what Sejeong thought of him? Is that what his reputation entailed? Some wannabe rocker who sleeps around school? And so what if half the school does know his number? What’s wrong with that? 

Trust a perfect girl like star student God Sejeong to make him feel lacking. In all aspects. He doesn’t need to know that them being partners is like some big cosmic joke before he graduates and leaves Busan.

Seungyoon resents it.

“Not really.” He sighs, suddenly very tired of this rollercoaster day. “Let’s just figure out the next schedule. I’m sure you’re very busy.”

With a careless forced-smile, he gets up and exits the classroom. He doesn’t see Kim Sejeong’s regretful, troubled face.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kang Drama comes out to play :))
> 
> I post teaser snippets for the next update on my AFF Profile wall and Twitter. If you’re interested, do drop by from time to time. :)
> 
> Next update is tentatively on Monday, May 18. 


	5. Chapter Five

**Five**

Kang Seungyoon doesn’t text her for three days. 

Sejeong hates that she’s been keeping count. She can’t erase the memory of his face when she said that meaningless quip. She thinks he’d laugh it off. But on second thought, if Seungyoon made that joke to her… she would have slapped him. 

It _is_ a careless remark. Especially for her--when she always takes pride in her control and restraint. 

She keeps herself from sighing, her wrists starting to cramp with the middle parts of playing Liszt’s _Un Sospiro_. Her face remains dutifully impassive. Usually when she is immersed in the piece, she doesn’t feel a thing. Under Dr. Choi’s hawk-like observation, she can’t afford to betray the fact that her mind is elsewhere. 

That easy smile, the dimple on his chin, his noticeably pink hand that rested on his cheek as he lazily looked at her. The problem is, in that short period, Kang Seungyoon made her feel at ease, somehow. 

And when she drops her guard, she tends to hurt people. 

She manages to finish _Un Sospiro_ without being off-tempo _too much_. Dr. Choi nods and writes something in his leather notebook. Kim Sejeong imagines what he writes about these thrice a week practices. 

_For the past three days, Kim Sejeong has been distracted because she was an unwitting bitch towards WINNER’s leader, main vocalist, and composer, Kang Seungyoon._

Yes, accurate.

“The end part was a bit too rushed, but everything else was passable.” Dr. Choi drones. “You should warm up your wrists more before our next session.”

“Yes, sir.”

“I heard Mr. Park assigned a duet performance in addition to your recital.” She nods. “Do I know your partner?”

“Kang Seungyoon.”

“Ah, Mr. Kang.” He replies, lost in thought. “Three years ago, I had the pleasure of being part of the panel when he auditioned for the scholarship program admission. Remarkable voice. It’s rare to encounter a baritone of his range.”

“What did you think of his talent?” Sejeong asks, genuinely curious about her old mentor’s thoughts.

“Very raw. Rough on the edges. But a powerful timbre. If he is willing to put in the work in honing his instrument, then perhaps we’ll see him rise into greater heights,” her mentor says. Sejeong is surprised he has a lot to say about him. “But I believe the young man has many distractions that will hinder... his progress.”

Sejeong tries not to make a face. Not many can afford a lifestyle where you’re consistently _not_ distracted. She is very aware that it takes a full household staff, plus the support of her mostly-absent-but-well-intentioned grandmother and father, to make sure she’s solely focused on improving her craft. 

She imagines that Seungyoon always has a lot going on in that big head of his. Sejeong stifles a smile.

“Is he still affiliated with that... rock band?” Dr. Choi asks.

WINNER just released an EP six months ago. Indie music blogs have been waxing ecstatic about their songs. “I have no idea, sir.” 

“Hmm. I’m sure I won’t have any problems with _you_ in that regard.” He means having distractions. Sejeong has gotten hate from friends and rivals over her practicing an average of six hours a day. Her focus is total and absolute. 

Dr. Choi retrieves a folder from his matching leather satchel and hands it to her. “For our next lesson, there is a piece I need you to learn.”

She glances at the music sheet’s title.“Is there any particular direction needed for the interpretation?”

“I give you free rein, Sejeong. Play it as you feel fit.”

There’s an unspoken challenge in there that she can’t fully identify. She nods and gets up to leave.

At home, she eats dinner in her room, eager to get started on her new assignment. Her fingertips hover on her laptop’s keyboard to type the _lieder_ ’s title, but she suddenly finds herself typing Kang Seungyoon’s name instead.

Sejeong blinks at the screen as the search result turns out. Did she really just--

There’s a playlist of his live performances. As she scrolls down, she realizes that she’s not familiar with his solo work. Yes, Sejeong has WINNER in her playlist, but she never thought to check their solo gigs.

Most of the videos were filmed in dark locations or had a blurry quality. Sejeong clicks on the first video. 

According to the title, Seungyoon has done a cover of Pearl Jam’s _Black_. He’s wearing a black leather jacket. He strums the black guitar unhurriedly, almost languidly, like the audience doesn’t exist. Kang Seungyoon’s voice is strong, clean, and powerful. The kind of raw that sinks into your skin, down to your soul.

_I know someday you'll have a beautiful life_

_I know you'll be a star in somebody else's sky, but why_

_Why, why can't it be, oh can't it be mine?_

The hairs in Sejeong’s arms stand up. When Kang Seungyoon sings, she feels like he’s just doing it for you. Just you. He takes away her pain, rage, sadness, hurt… and gives it a voice. His.

She cannot even _think_ about scrutinizing his vocal technique or if he is on pitch. He shows off his voice like a true extension of himself. His fingers plucking the guitar. His intense stare grazes the camera for a second, and she pauses the video abruptly.. 

Her heart beats so fast. How could she be _this_ affected by his mere voice? It’s not like she hasn’t had exposure to technically excellent tenors and altos who could bring the opera’s ceiling down.

Maybe the problem is that Sejeong couldn’t turn off the part of her brain that picked apart the music’s technical side. A blessing and a curse to be sure. But watching Kang Seungyoon perform, her thoughts are just shut down. 

What’s with him that stirs her so? 

No, no, not _him_. It’s his voice. Of course, it’s just his voice.

And with that calming thought, she justifies opening another tab, and types: _Kang Seungyoon profile_

  


Name: Kang Seung Yoon (강승윤)

Position: Leader, Main Vocalist, Lead Guitarist

Hometown: Busan, South Korea

Birthday: January 21, 1994

Zodiac Sign: Aquarius

Blood Type: B

  


There are random trivia under his bio, but Sejeong decides not to read it. She somehow feels she’s invading his privacy… which is crazy because it’s literally the top Google search of thousands of hits. 

But it’s different because she could just also _literally_ ask him the next time they meet. 

Which she won’t, of course. No need to get that familiar, right?

She clicks another video. This time, it’s a WINNER band performance in some tightly-packed bar. They’re playing a heavy bass song she doesn’t recognize. Probably an original or unreleased track. 

The camera pans to Song Mino, then back to Kang Seungyoon. The video is shaky, but the audio is excellent. Kang Seungyoon’s commanding voice fills the entire packed venue.

Sejeong gives herself permission to watch him for a moment. Then she scrolls down to the comment section.

  


**Kang Seungyoon’s voice is unreal.**

**GOD VOCALS INDEED.**

**i am so in love with him i would literally die for him no exaggeration**

**Thank GOD for those tight pants**

**1:44!!!!! Bless my eyes**

  


Out of curiosity, she clicks the time stamp. It has 305 likes after all.

Kang Seungyoon jumps up and down in time with the music, the mad crowd nearly drowning his already powerful voice. His oddly graceful hands slide down from his torso down, 

\--to the belt loops of his pants, 

\--and her eyes follow his hand that lands on his--

\--she slams the laptop down. Sejeong stands up and paces her room. Her face is hot. 

She plops face down on her bed. That blessed, er, blasted timestamp is now burned in her mind (1:44). 

That’s just _GREAT_.

After a few, deep soothing breaths, Sejeong reaches out for her phone and finally searches Dr. Choi’s new music for her. Had she just decided not to procrastinate in listening to this song then she wouldn’t have had an eyeful of Kang Seungyoon’s--

_Well._

She presses play. 

It’s a deceptively soft tune, but it’s a complex, intricate piece. Liszt is always a challenge for her to conquer on the keys. It calms her down somewhat. Maybe she’d look up the song’s meaning later.

Sejeong falls asleep on her second listen. But before she sinks beneath her dreams, it’s curious that this song makes her think of Kang Seungyoon’s pink hands. Sejeong doesn’t understand why.

Not yet, anyway.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is dedicated to Seungyoon's diaphragm's fans.
> 
> Sejeong is practicing Liszt's  Un Sospiro
> 
> Kang Seungyoon’s profile is taken straight from here.
> 
> I imagined Seungyoon singing to this arrangement of Pearl Jam’s Black. My regards to Eddie Vedder.
> 
> Tentative update is on Friday, May 22.
> 
> Your comments are better than Seungyoon's tight pants. Leave a comment if you're enjoying so far <3


	6. Chapter Six

**Six**

On Friday, they agree to meet in one of the smaller studios reserved for senior Composition majors. Seungyoon manages to sweet-talk one of the building administrators to reserve his favorite corner studio booth. 

He notices the coffee that Kim Sejeong brought with her (black as midnight), and compares it to the coffee he's drinking (a perfectly sweet vanilla iced latte, thank you very much). 

Covertly, he narrows his eyes at her. Seungyoon makes it a rule never to trust someone who drinks straight bitter, black Americano. 

They sit down by the tiny table, mostly covered by the iMac and a mishmash of audio equipment. Seungyoon has decided to let go of whatever pique he had with this girl, for the sake of just getting through this project. It’s not that they’re ever going to talk after the showcase, anyway.

And she doesn’t seem to be a mean girl. Reserved and rather stoic, maybe. Seungyoon can admit to being a little sensitive at times.

Without further ado, Kim Sejeong shows him a list of what she thinks they could perform as a duet. They're all the standard vocalist pieces like Duparc's _Lamento_ , Schubert's _Liebeslauchen,_ and Ravel's _Chanson Epique_.

Seungyoon has only heard of Schubert. The rest were song titles he'd seen in the intermediate level for classical vocalists. 

A bit disconcerted, he hands her his iPhone to share his list. 

Seungyoon covertly studies Sejeong's face as she goes through his suggestions. Her long, fine hair is swept up in a no-nonsense ponytail. The little line of concentration appears again, her face drawn in a grim expression. Always all business. 

Once again, Seungyoon idly wonders what it would take to rumple Kim Sejeong's composure.

Maybe this: "Don't tell me you've never listened to Alice in Chains? Pearl Jam? Soundgarden? Nirvana?"

She gives him a wry look. "Please. Decrepit as my tastes are, even I know Nirvana."

He inwardly cringes as the words leave his mouth. How can he manage to sound like the music snob between the two of them--the other being a classical piano prodigy? "That's not what I meant."

Sejeong ignores his comment and hands him back his phone. "But for the others... no, I haven't listened to their discography. It's not that I don't want to. I just don't have time when I have to practice six hours for one sheet music," she says, a touch defensively.

Seungyoon holds up his hands, surrendering. "Point taken. Should we listen to a few songs then?"

They listen to Kim Sejeong's list first. As the baritone's booming voice fills up the small room, they grow silent. 

With diligent practice (and maybe quitting smoking for three weeks), Seungyoon admits he could _probably_ do a passable job with the Schubert. He is about to share this humbling realization when he notices that Kim Sejeong isn't even listening. She is spacing out, her gaze unfocused.

Granted, she's probably heard this song a hundred times, but something in her defeated posture makes Seungyoon lower the volume a bit.

"Is everything okay?"

She blinked. "Huh? Yes, why?"

"You seem… distracted." Seungyoon observes.

"Was I?" She sighs. "Maybe I am a bit." 

"Why? Did something happen?"

"Nothing." She turns to dial up the volume again, but Seungyoon is already distracted. Anything to prolong this lull before he has to listen to Schubert for the nth time.

He bats her hand away. Sejeong glares at him. "As your partner, I demand to know what's bothering you if it's going to affect our grades." A downright lie. Seungyoon doesn't give a flying fuck about his grades, and he knows with a minimal effort he can manage a pass during the recital. But right now, he _is_ curious.

And it bothers Seungyoon somehow, that _her_ off mood bothers _him_.

She frowns. "It's really nothing too serious."

Seungyoon quickly thinks of the magic combination of words that would make her open up. "Just think of me as a trash receptacle."

"Pardon?"

"Look. After this little showcase, we'll graduate from university. We're not even friends. We probably won't see each other again. You'll go on to be a super famous classical pianist, and I'll become the biggest rockstar on the planet. Who would I tell your secrets to? Just dump everything on me, so it's just like talking to a trash can." 

He smiles lazily at her. "But you know, I'm way cuter to look at."

Sejeong raises an eyebrow. "You sure about that."

"100%."

"You're very… confident," she observes. 

Seungyoon leans back on his chair, making a loud, obnoxious _squeak_. 

"You find ways to be confident when you're thrust in a music school full of uber-talented music geniuses who've studied classical instruments since they were three years old. Did you know I've never seen a Kremona guitar before I entered here? I saw four on my first day, lying casually on a table during lunch break. One guitar could have paid our rent for 2 months." 

He shakes his head, remembering. "As a scholar, I needed to keep up my grades while working as a wedding singer on the side while still maintaining a full load of classes. That's why I needed to look at myself in the mirror and psych myself up in whatever way I can."

He pauses to take a breath and looks at Sejeong's startled face. He doesn't mean to share so much, but the words just pour out.

She ponders at his little speech, tilting her chin as if seeing him in a different light. He expects to see pity in Sejeong's eyes, but thank fuck there is none. 

She picks a random question instead. "You sing at weddings? WINNER sings at weddings?"

"Sometimes. Sometimes it's just me." He waggles her eyebrows. "The pay is ridiculous."

She smiles. "Good for you."

"Thank you." He treats her smile as his little victory for the day. "The floor is yours, Miss Sejeong."

She drums her fingers impatiently on the table. And gives a defeated sigh. "My one-on-one with Dr. Choi this morning didn't go too well. He gave me a piece to learn, and I _completely_ botched it."

"You? Botch something?" Seungyoon scoffs but she cuts him off.

"Don't." Sejeong stands, walks around the cramped room. Seungyoon is taken aback, but she continues, "Sorry. I'm not mad. I just hate it when people assume that I'm just… that I play _perfectly_ all the time. I don't, and I hate it--"

"Hey, hey. I get it." He soothes. "You are a perfectly good botcher of things. You botch stuff. Perfectly. All the time."

"Oh shut it." But it does the trick. She cracks a chuckle and goes back to her seat. She shrugs. "That's really just it. I hate disappointing him."

"Well, what did you do wrong?" Seungyoon sits up straighter, reaching out for his coffee. Maybe there's something that he can help her with. "Is the timing off? Or are your wrists too tense? Or maybe--"

"I NEED TO FALL IN LOVE."

Seungyoon is, unfortunately, drinking at that moment, so he snorts out his vanilla latte rather unbecomingly. 

"Excuse me?"

Sejeong covers her face with her hands as he wipes his chin. "Dr. Choi didn't say it directly but…" She slumps down the table. "I play it _technically_ well, but he says I lack the emotion to correctly interpret the damn piece."

"Hmm." Seungyoon fires up the studio's battered iMac and goes straight to YouTube. "What's the title again?"

_“Liebestraum._ Franz Liszt _.”_ she mumbles.

He plays the video. It starts off sweet and delicate. Calming even. Seungyoon couldn't imagine Sejeong having trouble with it. 

She seems to answer his thoughts. "At first, I didn't have any difficulty with Act One. But Act Two and Act Three…" she groans.

_Really_. Seungyoon is intrigued. "How come? What's the piece about anyway?"

" _Liebestraum_ in English is translated as Dreams of Love."

"Ah." He adjusts the volume as they reach the seven-minute mark. "And the Acts?"

"--Basically represents the kinds of love there is." She comes closer to him so she can move the cursor and show him the timestamps. Seungyoon holds his breath. "See, Act one is about divine or religious love. Martyr rejects worldly love and accepts heaven's gates, so on. Act Two is about "Blessed Death,"

"Sounds hardcore."

"It's erotic love." She deadpans, still looking at the screen. "The notes swell in this part, see? It's passionate and intense. The piece is supposed to evoke the physical aspect of love."

"You mean sex."

"Yes, I mean sex."

"Oh." He swallows. "And Act Three?"

"It's the most recognizable of the three, and the one I'm most nervous about." She clicks on the timestamp. Seungyoon realizes with a jolt that he can inhale Sejeong’s perfume from this distance. The scent is something soapy, clean, and very, very, very expensive. Too good for him, to be sure.

“Act Three is titled _lieb, so lang du lieben kannst._ ”

Seungyoon is momentarily distracted by her German. "Now you're just flirting with me."

"Am not." She flushed, still not looking at him. But he's definitely looking at her.. "Act Three is supposed to mean a mature kind of love. Of being reunited with someone you love even just in dreams. But then you wake up, and you're brought back to reality, where that love doesn't exist anymore."

Sejeong turns to face him, and their eyes meet. "In English, it means 'love as long as you can.'"

An odd spark rises between them, but neither one is willing to break the spell just yet. Seungyoon couldn't think of anything to say, except that he's oddly moved by what she just said.

She backs away from him and waves her hand airily. "Apparently I'm only good for the first part. The Second and Third Acts require a little more emotion from me, I suppose that's what Dr. Choi meant."

"You've never fallen in love?" Seungyoon asks quietly. 

She looks at him curiously, "Have you?"

"Sure. Or at least, I thought I was in love at that time," he answers smoothly. "Whatever it was, it's enough to translate on stage."

She ponders on his take. "Well, I don't have your, um, showmanship." 

"Believe me, you can fake anything on stage." Seungyoon shrugs. He writes and sings about love and heartbreak like he knows everything there is to know about it.

"But I need to _feel_ it, so I know what to fake in the first place." she insists.

"So your practical solution, Miss Sejeong, is to fall in love."

She shrugs. "A short fling will do. I'm not picky."

Seungyoon's heart stops. And then _gallops_.

"You.." He clears his throat. "You're telling me this because…" 

"You're a trash can, remember."

"RIGHT. Of course." He wills his face to resemble a perfect nonchalance. For a moment he thought she was-- 

"Fall in love to correctly interpret a Liszt piece and satisfy your old geezer of a mentor, sure solid plan. Got it. How can I help?" 

"You already have." She says this so seriously like she is seeing him for the first time. "Thank you."

He mock-salutes her. "Trash can is now incinerating this conversation in 3...2...1." 

She grins and shakes her head. Seungyoon guesses that she's not the type to laugh that much. But she's done a fair bit of it during their time together. He doesn't want to read too much into that.

_Careful._

"About our showcase." Sejeong says slowly, "Maybe it's a good idea not to do the usual classical route."

_Yes!_ "What made you change your mind?"

"I think I'd be stupid not to follow Kang Seungyoon's instincts about these things." She rolls her eyes good-naturedly. "You know your voice better than anyone. Even the audience. I should leave the song choice up to you."

"And the arrangement?"

She gives him a withering look. "Just do it, Kang Seungyoon."

He laughs. He's not above feeling smug that Kim Sejeong thinks of him highly in this regard. At the least, they have this mutual respect and obsession about perfecting their craft.

But at the most...

Seungyoon waves the thought away and starts opening his audio files that needed mixing as a distraction. He's fine. This is fine. Look she's already leaving, and everything will be fine.

Sejeong picks up her bag. "I need to go. Thanks for… listening."

"Sure," Seungyoon mutters. He hears her open the door. Thank fuck he hasn't done anything stupid like suddenly ask Kim Sejeong out or--

"And um," She hangs just outside the door. "I want to say sorry. For last time."

Seungyoon stills. "Sorry about what?"

"Er, about me insinuating you're--" She presses her lips together.

_Ah._ "Fucking half the school, yes."

"I was thinking along the lines of _dating_." She corrects him gently. "Dating half the school."

He grumbles. "I'm not dating anyone okay. I haven't dated anyone for a while. I don't really date that much. I've had _one_ ex." 

And yet again, Seungyoon has no idea why he just shared this with her.

Sejeong chides him. "Mr. Kang, I haven't agreed to be your trash can just yet." 

But she grins at him, scrunching her nose, and gently closes the door with a mild click.

So cute, Seungyoon thinks.

And he's so fucked.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Liszt - [Liebestraum.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0XDWo7gVDoY)  
> The part where Sejeong is having difficulty with starts at 12:05. It’s also the most famous part of this piece, but as a whole, it’s a really lovely composition.
> 
> Seungyoon was just revealed to be Joo Yoon Bal on King of Masked Singers. He is the youngest and only idol to win the KOMS crown six times. It's bittersweet to see him go, but he had a very good run. So proud of him! If you want to see highlights of his vocal performances, check it out [ here.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nVW8m0IwwyY&feature=youtu.be)
> 
>   
> I am working on a new WIP fic! It's been highly-requested, so I thought I'd give it a shot. First update will definitely be this week. If you're curious, keep an eye out for the first chapter here, or at my [Twitter.](https://tumblr.com/%5Bbeta's_tumblr_name%5D)
> 
> Hello to old and new subscribers! Thank you always for reading. If you enjoyed this update, please leave a comment! :) Hope you guys had a wonderful weekend.


	7. Chapter Seven

7

As far as Sejeong is concerned, one of the downsides of being one of the few musicians in the family is always having to "volunteer" whenever there's a wedding.

Not that she minded particularly this time. Her favorite cousin, Tae Ho, is getting married to the love of his life today. As Sejeong has no siblings, Tae Ho doted on her like a beloved little sister, until he moved to Singapore and met his soon-to-be-wife. They are both university professors when they'd met in a mixer.

Now, they're back in Busan to hold the extravagant wedding ceremony. Privately, Tae Ho shared with Sejeong that he and his fiancee couldn't care less about holding a lavish event, but they couldn't say no to the elders. 

Therefore: Jeondong Cathedral. 500 guests. Park Hyatt hotel decked to the nines. The bride’s bespoke Sarah Burton wedding gown flown from London. The wedding announcement naturally made the Tatler Singapore and L'Officiel Korea.

Yes, Sejeong didn't mind playing for her cousin's wedding (as a gift), but what she isn't looking forward to is the social circus after. Mingling with older aunts and uncles, society matrons, drunk groomsmen--she sighs. The wedding reception will only be for one night, but she already feels bone-weary.

It doesn’t help that her disappointment over her piano solo practice continues.

It’s not that she can’t play Liebestraum perfectly. At this point, she can do it with her eyes closed. But Sejeong couldn’t help but notice Dr. Choi’s slightly-less-than-thrilled tone whenever he says “that’s fine.” “ adequate.” “Passable”. Sejeong wants nothing more than to blow his mind out of the water. But how?

Well, one thing’s for sure. It’s not blurting out to Kang Seungyoon that she needs to fall in love in order to correctly interpret the song.

She groans. The way her brain betrays her sometimes...

"Do you not like something, Sejeong?" Yunhee is the salon's resident makeup artist and Sejeong's go-to person at every school recital and showcase since highschool. They've become close acquaintances over the years. "Did I go too heavy with the eyes?"

"Oh… no, it's fine." Sejeong replies. "Just thinking of the long night ahead."

"Everyone's just been so excited about this wedding. It feels like half of Busan is attending. What color of the dress are you wearing?"

Sejeong thinks about the Reformation dress that Mina forced on her last year. Thankfully it still fits her. "Emerald green, I think?"

"Got it." She applies something to her eyes that make her look more awake. "I'm sure it's going to be a magical night."

Just then, Sejeong's phone rings. She checks the caller ID. Speaking of the devil. The groom himself.

"Oppa," she grins. "Getting cold feet?"

"Sejeongie." Tae Ho's voice is frantic over the phone. "I NEED YOUR HELP."

"I'm not bailing you out of the wedding."

"I'm not having cold feet, you brat. The fucking wedding reception singer backed out just now. Says he got an emergency or something, the bastard."

"What? The one who's supposed to sing for the first dance?"

" _ YES _ . And we spent so much effort looking for his kind of voice. You remember how hard Jin Ae looked for a singer. Twas like Superstar K in our Singapore flat when she called for auditions to sing this blasted song."

"Can't you just get someone from the church choir?"

"They're children, Sejeongie." Tae Ho's voice is patiently exasperated. "Look, is there anyone from your friends that can learn the song in time for tonight? I just want to fix this quickly before Jin Ae finds out, and she frets about this the entire day."

Male vocal. Born to perform. Has experience in wedding singing. A name pinged her head.  _ Of course. _

Sejeong remembers his face when she had explained what the Liebestraum acts meant. 

Normal Sejeong would tell Tae Ho right now:  _ Sorry, I don’t know anyone who can perform the piece in such a short time. _

However, Not-So-Normal Sejeong has other ideas.

"I might know someone," she says slowly, hardly believing the words coming out of her mouth. "But I don't know if he's free, and he might be expensive because of the short notice."

"I'll throw in double of his usual rate if he says yes." He replies quickly.

"Well… let me check if he's available," Sejeong hears her cousin breathing heavily on the other line. "Relax, Oppa. You're still going to get married to the woman of your dreams today, no matter what."

"I just want today to be perfect for her. Please, please help me Sejeongie."

"I'll try, but no promises." They say a hurried goodbye. Yunhee looks over at her with concern. 

"Is everything okay?"

"I'm not sure yet." Sejeong examines Yunhee’s work on her face. She looks fresh and awake and put together. " _ I love it _ . Thank you."

She reaches for her phone again and scrolls down to KANG SEUNGYOON in her contacts. They've exchanged messages over scheduling and song list concerns, but they haven't resorted to calling. It feels like crossing an imaginary line, which is insane. 

To quote him: they're not even friends.

But this qualifies for an emergency, right? The worst that could happen is she plays the piano sans vocalist, and the bride would just have to make do. Oh well.

She taps the call button. On the seventh ring, Seungyoon picks up.

"Who the fuck is this?" His voice is deep, groggy, and scratchy as if she roused him from sleep. Sejeong glances at the salon's ornate clock: 11:45 AM.  _ Rough night? _

"Hi. It's me, Kim Sejeong. Is… this a bad time?"

"Who?" He sounds confused. "...You didn't say Kim Sejeong, did you?" 

" _ Yes _ ," Sejeong replies patiently. "I need a favor. An emergency favor."

Seungyoon suddenly sounds alert, like he scrambled to get up from the bed. "What happened? Are you in trouble?" 

"On a Sunday morning?"

"You tell me." He replies flatly.

Sejeong tries not to smile. Why does she find it cute? "No, I'm not in trouble. I'm about to go to my cousin's wedding today. Their wedding reception singer backed out. So I thought you might be interested in replacing him if you have nothing better to do today."

Silence.

She blurts out. "And my cousin is willing to pay double your rate, by the way, so..."

"Fuck, yes. I'm in."

" _ Great _ ," Sejeong says, relieved. "Message me your address so I can send a car over."

"That's not really necessary. Just tell me where to show up."

"Trust me. It's quicker this way." What, with the security in the hotel today, going inside will be a nightmare. Better that he arrives in one of the family cars. "And the dress code is black tie."

"Ah, shit. Mine's still… in the dry cleaners."

Sejeong thinks about her Tae Ho's closet-full of formalwear back at his house and about the lengths that his cousin is willing to go to for his wedding. Desperate times call for desperate measures.

"That's okay. We'll figure it out when you get here." Sejeong says. "See you in a bit?"

"Fine."

After they hang up, Sejeong makes another call to Tae Ho's house. On the second ring, the housekeeper picked up.

"It's me, Sejeong. I need you to go to Tae Ho's closet and bring the following suits to Room 404 at the Park Hyatt Hotel."

Xxx

At one o'clock in the afternoon, Sejeong meets Seungyoon at the grand lobby. He wears a plain white shirt and ripped black jeans. His hair is ruffled and half-dry from a (she assumes) a quick shower. 

She can't help but notice how his untamed vibe is so out of place with this stuffy venue. He stops and stares when he reaches her.

"Hello," she greets him with an apologetic smile. "This is all too sudden, I'm sorry."

"Don't be. I'm getting good money out of this." He grins. "You look nice."

She blinks and realizes it's the first time Seungyoon is seeing her with a full makeup look. "Thanks. Let's go up."

They're situated in the groom's deserted hotel suite after getting his permission ( _ "Get whatever he needs," _ ) to raid his closet AND take over his room. Right now, they're doing the pre-nuptial photoshoot, so Sejeong and Seungyoon have space to themselves.

"Are you sure this is okay?" Seungyoon says dubiously at the rack of formal wear that greets him. 

"Positive. Those suits don't fit Tae Ho anymore." Sejeong ponders about the choices that the housekeeper sent, and swings her gaze to Seungyoon's frame. She swears that she looks at him  _ objectively _ .

"You seem to be the same built with Tae Ho before, and almost the same height too. Try this on first." She hands him the Pat Zileri two-piece tuxedo and directs him to the bathroom.

After a while, he emerges. 

"Well?"

The Pat Zileri is a stretch wool suit, done in a stone-gray color that registers a deep green in some angles. The shoulders are lightly padded, and the breast pockets are fully lined. The matching pants are midrise and have a relaxed fit.

At school, Kang Seungyoon wears a school uniform. In videos that Sejeong has seen on YouTube, he favors a leather jacket, shirt, and ripped jeans combination. She has never seen him in any kind of formal wear.

And now that she has, he is  _ devastating _ in a proper tuxedo outfit.

Seungyoon raises his eyebrows as the unexpected silence was beginning to get awkward. Sejeong clears her throat. "Looks good. What do you think?"

He looks down at himself. "I think it's okay?"

_ Get a hold of yourself, Sejeong.  _ She circles him and looks at the clothes with a critical eye. "Yes, but now that I'm looking at it, the cut does nothing for your body."

"My body," He repeats.

".. _ type _ . I meant your body type." Sejeong covers her mistake by gently folding the two sides of the jacket and gathering it to his back. Seungyoon stays completely still. "Your torso is long and lean, so it's better if the tailoring hugs you better here, see?"

He stiffly nods. Sejeong continues, crouching down to fold the hems gingerly. "And look how the pants fall over your legs, the length isn't quite right."

"Uh-huh."

Sejeong stands up and looks over him. "Also, the 100% wool might be making you too hot. You look flushed. The next suits are more of a blend, so it's cooler on the skin."

"I'm fine." He looks away, "What's next?"

"Try the black one next."

He goes back to the bathroom. As soon as she's alone, Sejeong makes a face to herself. Apparently, if there is something to rival the effect of Kang Seungyoon's voice on her, it's seeing him wearing expensive formal wear. She turns down the AC.

Seungyoon comes out wearing the second outfit. 

Sejeong sighs. Tom Ford is a  _ genius _ .

The sharp black jacket follows the lines of his body very well. Silk cuffs give it a nice touch. The matching trousers show off the length of his legs better, giving it a more flattering fit.

Seungyoon could honestly give a young James Bond a run for his money.

He turns around. "Yeah, I think I see what you mean."

"Right? A great cut makes all the difference, but…" She frowns. "You look almost  _ too _ serious in that suit."

"Huh." Seungyoon examines himself in the full-length mirror. "Isn't that the point tonight?"

Yes, but… Sejeong doesn't want him to look like he's playing dress-up.  She still wants him to look like himself, but in a distinctive way.

"Just try the last one." Sejeong insists. He shrugs and goes back inside.

When Kang Seungyoon steps back outside to the living room where she waits, she holds her breath.

The Ermenegildo Zegna looks positively divine on his lean frame. The sharper-than-usual nip offsets the classic cut of the blazer at his waist. The flat front of the slim-fit trousers gives the entire suit a modern, youthful feel. It's a cut that only Seungyoon's body can show off properly.

He throws her a wry smile. "I can see from your face that this is the one."

Sejeong laughs self-consciously. Was she that transparent? "But what did you like better? You should choose what you feel best in."

"I'll trust your taste." He concedes. "This looks better on me. If I had an extra 1,000,000 won or something, I'd pick this."

The price is double that, but Sejeong wisely keeps silent. It is then that she notices that the silk lapels are crooked. Sejeong steps in closer, gesturing to his blazer, "May I…?"

"Um, sure," He is quiet for a while as she adjusts the lapels. It miraculously fits him so well. Next to the groom, Seungyoon would be the best-dressed man in the venue probably. 

"You seem to know a lot about men's clothing." He observes.

"Hmm?" 

"Did you do this a lot for your old boyfriends or something?"

Startled, Sejeong looks up at him, watching her. She belatedly doesn't realize the difference between their heights, until she stands this close to him. His face isn't impish or humorous. He looks uncharacteristically… serious. Seungyoon wants a real answer. 

"Ah... no. When you're in and out recitals, you're naturally surrounded by male classmates who absolutely have no idea about formalwear. It's a matter of trying to be helpful."

"I see."

"And... I've never had a boyfriend." She adds lamely.

"Why is that?"

She shrugs. "Never met anyone who could tear me away from my music long enough for me to be in a relationship, I guess."

Seungyoon has a mole at the tip of his nose, Sejeong realizes with a start. How come she never noticed before?  _ That's because you've never stood to him this close, dummy. _

They continue to stare at each other wordlessly. It feels like they are waiting for... something. Her eyes helplessly drift down to Seungyoon's lips. 

Three sharp buzzes from the doorbell make them spring apart like they are on fire.

"Miss Sejeong?"

"Yes?" She squeaks.

One of the staff members opens the door and gives a shallow bow. "The instruments are already set up in the reception. You can now rehearse if you're ready?"

"Yes. Please wait for us." Sejeong crosses the other side of the room and picks up a pair of shoes. She hands them to Seungyoon, grateful that her hands aren't trembling. "Here, you should wear these."

Seungyoon whistles. "Wow, these are sweet."

She grins. The Alexander McQueen's delicate crystal embellishments on the velvet shoes are a nice touch to complement the stark black suit. "Please take care of this pair, it costs more than what you’re wearing."

He sputters. "That's… How can you expect me to sing tonight knowing that?"

"You'll be fine." She grins, pushing him to the door. "I need to quickly get in my dress. I'll meet you at the reception, okay? Five minutes."

Once he's out the door, Sejeong nearly sags against the wall. She could feel her lungs working overtime- _ breathe in, breathe out _ . 

He's just a boy. He's just Kang Seungyoon. In an exquisite $4,000 tuxedo that magnifies his sex appeal a hundred times over. In five minutes, she'll get over it. Her cheeks felt hot to the touch. 

Sejeong is in so much trouble.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is me, partially fulfilling my need to imagine Seungyoon in formal suits and a reversed makeover montage :))))))
> 
> During my semi-hiatus, Seungyoon has started filming for the MBC drama, Kairos, while Sejeong is in talks for a new drama! Please support them <3
> 
> [I’m Drunk, I Love You](%E2%80%9C) is my *new* Minyoon WIP fic, give it a read if you’re interested :) (Updates are in progress!)
> 
> Also, if you have time, please do give this [link](%E2%80%9C) a share.
> 
> Hope wherever you guys are, you’re all safe.


	8. Chapter Eight

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> is this mic on? :))
> 
> Two months of no update! I know! Things have been crazy in my country and I was just not in the right frame of mind to write. But hopefully the next updates won't take as long as I've pretty much drafted the major scenes until the ending. 
> 
> And surprise it's a double chapter update weekend! Expect Chapter Nine to be uploaded in the next few hours.
> 
> Hope you are all safe, healthy, and happy :)
> 
> This is one of my most favorite chapters to write. :) Enjoy.

_ You're in my arms _

_ And all the world is gone _

_ The music playing on _

_ For only two _

_ So close together _

_ And when I'm with you _

_ So close to feeling alive _

Seungyoon has been to many weddings, and he supposes even he can already detect a template to the look at this point:

A long aisle (Check.)

Some kind of stage (Check.)

Lots and lots of flowers (Check.)

Gauzy curtains (Check.)

Round tables for the guests (Check.)

  
  


… but once Seungyoon steps inside the reception, he immediately knows that this wedding is a cut above the rest that he's been in.

As proof, he glances at the white Steinway grand piano by the main stage. The groom had it brought in for Sejeong, solely for one performance. A few hours ago, an old gentleman came in the middle of their practice, who turns out to be Sejeong's on-call piano tuner. 

Oh, how the other half lives, Seungyoon thinks idly. 

The wedding song is Jon McLaughlin's So Close. He has sung it once in another wedding reception, so he's familiar with the lyrics somewhat, but it was played on a recorded instrumental, not a live baby grand piano under the hands of Kim Sejeong.. 

It's funny that their "partnership" will be put into a sudden trial during a wedding performance. Seungyoon had been curious about how Sejeong would be as an accompanist.

During rehearsal, she is attentive to his cues and pitch but offers minimal suggestions. She reasons that his voice should shine more during the song anyway. Seungyoon decides to save the vocal acrobatics for the actual performance. His voice isn't in its ideal state, as he came from a gig last night. Getting Kim Sejeong's phone call is the last thing he could have expected today.

Not that he even thinks of saying no to her.

They had been able to squeeze in a few rounds of practice. When Seungyoon had asked Sejeong if she would be missed in the church ceremony, she just rolled her eyes ("They're both atheists") and continued practicing.

It's unnerving to see her play this close. Wearing that spectacular green dress that hugs her body too fucking well. By all means, it's a conservative dress, high neckline, and all. But Seungyoon is caught off guard by the slit that opens as she sits on the piano bench. And the unexpected cutout that shows the expanse of her bare lower back. 

Seungyoon stumbles on their first round, madly distracted by how devastating God Sejeong looks, that she had to pause in the middle of her playing and ask if he was up to the task. As he is an exceptionally prideful person, he steeled himself to behave and concentrate.

Sing now, admire her later.

The pompous-looking host is in the middle of introducing the newly-wedded couple. After that, it's the first dance. 

Seungyoon adjusts the cuffs of his borrowed suit. It's a touch uncomfortable, as his department-store bought one definitely did not hug his ass this tight, but the slight discomfort is worth it just so he can replay Sejeong's face when he stepped out.

He suppresses a smile. Beside him, Sejeong looks at him curiously. He shakes his head and mouthed:  _ nothing _ . 

"And now, let's welcome the newly-weds as they take the stage for their first dance!"

He takes his place near the ridiculous Steinway. Sejeong sits regally on the bench, fingers poised above the keys. They nod at each other to begin. 

Softly, delicately, she plays the song's opening notes. An appreciative sigh sweeps the room.

Not to be outdone, Seungyoon opens his mouth and starts to sing. He imagines singing this song to a girl that's too good for him.

  
  


_ A life goes by _

_ Romantic dreams must die _

_ So I bid mine goodbye _

_ And never knew _

_ So close was waiting, waiting here with you _

_ And now forever I know _

  
  


The applause is deafening. Seungyoon catches Sejeong's eyes, and they give each other a small smile wordlessly saying, good job, we didn't fuck that up.

The couple bows to the guests and, to his surprise, gestures to Sejeong and Seungyoon for a deep bow and claps heartily. Seungyoon gives a sigh of relief as both of them bow back. At least he did a satisfactory job for the double pay.

The wedding program continues. Sejeong leads Seungyoon to an empty table, where the waiting staff instantly serves them the dinner they missed before their performance. Usually, as a performer, he's given the same meal as the staff. But today, perhaps he's in the weird gray area of being a performer and Sejeong's friend. Or a guest, he corrects himself.

In any case, she doesn't abandon him to be with her cousins or something. She's been quiet, but he's strangely grateful not to be alone in this opulent event. 

A shadow falls on their table. Seungyoon looks up to see a tall gentleman approach them, with graying hair on his temples and an unmistakable kingly air. He seems somehow familiar, like he'd seen him before. 

Sejeong stands and gives him a peck on the cheek. They have a low conversation, but Seungyoon couldn't hear them over the loud sound system. 

Eventually, Sejeong calls for him. He approaches them and nearly chokes on his own breath as she casually introduces Seungyoon to her father.

He knows that Sejeong is filthy rich, but it is only now that his brain is mentally replaying Mino and Hyunjung's casual mentions about her family.

"I heard they own an alternative energy company."

Right.

"Isn't CEO Kim Gunwoo already number 29 on the Forbes list?"

Uh-huh.

"I think her grandmother owns the Busan Symphony Orchestra or something--"

Wildly, Seungyoon thought that he hasn't even asked her out and now he's meeting her CEO father--not that he's going to ask Kim Sejeong out of course--

Kim Gunwoo grasps his hand firmly and looks at him in the eye. For a crazy moment, Seungyoon is terrified that he has noticed how Seungyoon has looked at his daughter all evening. 

The gentleman says almost gruffly, "I was telling Sejeong here that it's been a long time since I've heard that kind of voice. You have an amazing talent, young man."

"Thank you, sir." Seungyoon replies, dazed, and abashed. And relieved.

Sejeong grins warmly like she is proud of him. Her father continues, "You're Sejeong's classmate at school?"

"Yes, sir, for a few projects."

"And have you got any plans after school?" He asks.

"Uh, a few. None set in stone yet. Sir." Seungyoon replies, not wanting to bore him with details.

"Hmm." He looks at Sejeong. "A voice like his will open doors anywhere."

"Indeed," she agrees. It's the first time Seungyoon hears her directly complement his singing. He'd expected that she'd be harder to impress.

"Tae Ho should have paid you for tonight," her father grumbles at Sejeong.

She laughs. Her face is soft, like never before. "It's my wedding gift, Dad." 

"Hmph,"

Seungyoon is entranced with their interaction. 

Her father claps him on the back, "I'll be watching your career from afar with interest, young man. Enjoy the rest of the evening." He looks at Seungyoon in the eye, "Don't get my daughter drunk too much, or you'll be sorry."

Seungyoon blanches, "Sir, that 's--I would never--"

"Dad," Sejeong sighs, shaking her head at Seungyoon. "He's just teasing you,"

Kim Gunwoo raises his hands in defeat. "I'm just saying. You're both young, and you should have fun. But not too much," and backs away. 

When he leaves, Seungyoon expels a heavy gust of breath he doesn't realize he'd been holding.

Sejeong looks at Seungyoon apologetically. "Sorry about that. He really wanted to talk to you."

"It's fine," Seungyoon replies. "Your dad's actually very... cool." He imagines that a CEO like that would have a typical uptight--maybe elitist--personality.

"He is. I don't deserve him." Sejeon sighs. She changes the subject. "It won't be long before all my other relatives descend on you. They're suckers for talented musicians. I won't blame you if you want to leave."

"You're not actually telling me to refuse more external validation and praise from your family, are you?"

"I'm just worried about keeping your ego in check," she deadpans.

"Duly noted." 

They smile at each other. It feels warm, and Seungyoon knows it has nothing to do with the wool blend suit he's wearing.

"Want to check out the bar?"

  
  


_ All that I want is to hold you so close _

_ So close to reaching that famous happy end _

_ Almost believing this one's not pretend _

_ And now you're beside me, and look how far we've come _

_ So far, we are so close _

  
  


Seungyoon drags the cigarette slowly, feeling the nicotine calm his insides. He needs a moment to catch some air after the bride and groom (and a few of the wedding entourage) spot them hanging out in the bar. 

Tequila shots are liberally forced on them, and he had no choice but to gamely down every shot, as Sejeong isn't backing down. And now his head is spinning.

He spots a wide balcony outside the hall, where a few guests were milling about. He picks a shadowy part and lights up a much-needed smoke. 

The balcony overlooks the hotel's famous gardens. Overhead, the sky is dotted with bright stars. It is too dark to see anything, but Seungyoon bets that the view is spectacular in the morning, where one can see the sea. 

Sejeong arrives where he is hiding like she knows where he is the entire time. She's holding two bottles of beer and offers one to him.

He raises his eyebrow. Sejeong shrugs. "Those are the last two bottles with an ABV below 8%." They clink bottles with half-hearted cheers and take a swig. 

Sejeong eyes his cigarette. "Aren't you worried about your voice? And possibly cancer?"

He chooses an answer that will irk her., "As I said, I like living on the edge."

She looks away, unconcerned. "Your funeral."

He winces, but decides that one is totally on him.

She leans on the balcony railing, staring at the cool darkness. Sejeong looks ridiculously hot wearing the lady-like dress while taking a sip straight from the bottle's mouth. 

Seungyoon's collar feels hot against his neck. Fucking alcohol. Yes, as a wise philosopher once said (Jamie Foxx, Intuition album), he's blaming the alcohol.

"Where did you learn to sing like that?" she asks.

"Well, where did you learn to play like that?" he counters.

She pauses before answering. "It was the only way I could have a dog."

"Seriously?"

"My grandmother promised me this cute puppy I saw on TV. It was a show that featured a shelter. I wanted one, and grandmother said I could if I managed to learn Fur Elise in a week. I was five. I learned it in two days."

"Where's the dog now? Is it still with you?"

"No, I don't know what happened to it. I never got the poor thing." She sighs. "It was just a ruse to get me interested in a piano."

Seungyoon stares at her, aghast. "That's…"  _ cruel _ . "...terrible."

"My grandmother has always used unconventional ways to get what she wants." She murmurs. "But it worked. I fell in love with the piano. Thank you for feeling bad, though."

Seungyoon meets her eyes. "Promises should always be kept."

She smiles, but says nothing, and takes a sip of her beer.

"You didn't answer my question," she prompts after a while. "Any of your family inclined with music too?"

"Not sure. Singing's just something I've always been able to do."

"Oh. Your mom or dad doesn't sing?"

He keeps his gaze on the grounds. "My mom is tone-deaf, but she enjoys music very much. I don't know my father, so I have no answer for you there."

Seungyoon feels her eyes on him again, but he doesn't dare look back at her. It's something he rarely talks about, just with Mino and Hyunjung. It must be the alcohol making him talk. And the dark, private corner that they share in this balcony, causing him to spill secrets.

"I see," Sejeong says finally. She takes a deep breath. "My mother died when I was young, and I know it's not the same, but I think I can understand, even a little bit."

It's like a wall has come down temporarily between them, and he sees Sejeong relax for the first time. He follows her lead.

Sejeong has a wry sense of humor, self-deprecating, sharp at times, but without real malice. Her attention is focused solely on him, and for once, she's not distracted or thinking about something else. 

The breeze picks up, the smell of the ocean drifting where they stand a bit closer together. 

He feels her shiver. Seungyoon stubs his cigarette and takes off his coat. Gingerly, he puts it around Sejeong's shoulders. She murmurs a soft thanks.

Seungyoon glances inside and sees that the dancefloor is packed. If anything, the newlyweds know how to throw a wicked party. He wonders if he is overstaying his welcome, if he's keeping her here out of obligation, and should he just go.

"You must hear this all the time, but your voice is really something else," she says, very quietly.

Seungyoon looks back at her with surprise. "Thank you. That's a lot coming from God Sejeong."

She makes a face, one that makes her look way younger than she is. Playful Sejeong. He imagines not a lot can see her acting like this.

"What do you plan to do after graduation?" she asks.

"Move to Seoul, most likely." He says, leaning his back on the railing. He gazes at the direction of the sea. "Two of our members are already there. Talks about possible contracts have already started."

"Really? That's wonderful!" She rests her hand on his arm, facing him. "You'll take Seoul by storm. I can already feel it in my bones."

For most of the year, it has been Seungyoon's burden, thinking about the band's future. Will they make it? Will they drown? Will they survive intact?

Will he? 

And at this moment in time, Sejeong's conviction touches him. 

"What about you?" He rests his hip on the balcony rail, facing her too. "What are you going to do after?"

Of course, he means career-wise. She'll make a spectacular--and marketable--classical artist. She's young, elegant, devastatingly beautiful. 

He can already see it: she'll be one of Korea's famous pianists, she'll meet some chaebol heir, they'll have 2.5 kids, and this night that they are sharing right now in this balcony will be forgotten forever.

Or maybe she'll remember him to sing for her wedding. He'll even give her a discount.

Sejeong tightens the hold on his coat on her shoulders. "I haven't made any decision yet. Dr. Choi wants me to consider Europe but--" she pauses, looking past his shoulder, far away again. "There's an expectation that after I graduate, I'd be joining my grandmother in whatever venture she deems I'm fit in."

"You don't want it?"

"I don't know." Her laugh is tinged with bitterness. "Maybe I'm an over-privileged person for saying this, but it's because I have unlimited choices that I feel like I'm being pulled into different directions. My goal has just always been to do my best. But what to make of that? I don't know. That's okay, right?"

Seungyoon recognizes the vulnerability in her question. It was a crack in her usually strong facade. He smiles. "Of course, that's okay. You should do whatever you want, Kim Sejeong."

She smiles back, a little sad. "I wish that was true."

So in a few months, that will be their immediate reality then: he's leaving for Seoul, she's staying in Busan.

It's oddly fitting, Seungyoon thinks, but as he studies her face covertly, something heavy sinks in his stomach.

Music floats from the wedding hall. Sejeong exclaims abruptly. 

"Oh, I love this song."

Seungyoon looks at the crowd inside the venue. The frenetic pace has slowed down, and most of the couple sway in their own space on the dance floor. He recognizes the song: it's Etta James' At Last. 

He glances back at Sejeong. A devil's impulse rises in him, an instinct that he bows to in each crucial decision he has made in his life. 

Picking up the guitar. Going to the Busan school audition. Saying yes to being part of WINNER.

Seungyoon knows that this moment is one of those. When would he have this moment again? He's leaving Seoul, she's staying in Busan.

"Would you like to dance?"

She swivels her eyes to his, looking a bit startled. She is flushed, a bit tipsy to be sure, but she's in complete control of her senses. He waits with bated breath.

"Here?"

He shrugs. He watches her deliberate for a moment.

"Sure." Sejeong steps closer to him, putting one hand on his shoulder and reaching out to his other hand. He could feel the callouses on her fingers, like the ones on his.

They slowly sway in time to the slow music. 

His fingers itch to brush the stray strand of hair that came loose on her cheek, but he stays his hand. His mind grapples for a safe topic. 

Seungyoon remembers her rant about "botching" her recital piece. "Any luck with your Liebestraum?"

Her mouth twitches. "Excellent German, Kang Seungyoon. Have you been practicing?"

"You mock me so well already."

"I have a session with Dr. Choi tomorrow." Her eyes study his face openly. The look that she gives him… Seungyoon's mouth goes dry. "Let's see if there's some improvement."

"And how's the plan to fall in love coming along?" he asks, the fingers on his back lightly tracing the bare skin of her lower back.

She just looks at him, equally dangerous. "It's going very well."

  
  


_ If I should lose you now? _

_ We're so close to reaching that famous happy end _

_ Almost believing this one's not pretend _

_ Let's go on dreaming, though we know we are _

_ So close, so close, and still so far _

  
  
  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> These are the versions of the songs I imagined the scenes with:
> 
> I imagined this was the how Seungyoon sang So Close - Jon McLaughlin's So Close - https://youtu.be/oWCbpnqlWOw 
> 
> I imagined them dancing to this version of Etta James' At Last (Kevin Michael cover) - https://youtu.be/6d3PDu_o2zY 


	9. Chapter Nine

"You're a thousand miles away, Kim Sejeong." Kang Mina helpfully points out as they plant themselves on to a free lunch table. There are no free seats inside the cafeteria, so they have to make do outside, underneath the Camellia trees.

It's unmistakeably Monday--students mill about the grassy lawn, everyone still shaking off the lazy weekend energy.

It's been a brutal morning. Especially when one only got three hours of sleep. And nursing a major hangover. She shouldn't have said yes to the tequila shots. And the beer. And the Jager. Sejeong had a moderate alcohol tolerance at best, but she could never escape a killer hangover.

"My head hurts like a mother-effer." Sejeong complains, pushing her food tray away.

"Say it with me, Sejeong. Motherfucker. Motherfucker. Don't half-ass it."

She slumps further down the table, as the light hurts her eyes so bad. "Minaaa. Please leave me alone."

"And how was the wedding?" Mina asks in a chirper tone, ignoring her complaints. "My aunt is still complaining that she didn't get an invite. Apparently, it was the social event of the season."

"Fine. I got home at 4." 

Mina mock-gasps. "This morning? My god. I'm so proud of you. Seriously, I will cry."

Sejeong groans. It's not that she doesn't go out! Because of course, she does. Like, going to a classical piano concert that Dr. Choi recommended. Or an opera night with her grandmother. 

_ Fine _ , that sounds lame even in her head.

"And did Kang Seungyoon really show up to perform? Why didn't you tell me he'd be there?"

"It was all last-minute." She shoots a dirty look at Mina. "And I didn't know you'd be interested."

She scoffs. "Oh retract the claws, I'm just pointing it out." She stands abruptly, wallet on hand. "That's it. I'm buying your coffee. I can't stand your mood."

Sejeong gasps in relief. "I love you. Please make it black. With an extra espresso shot."

Mina rolls her eyes and heads back inside the cafeteria. 

Sejeong rests her forehead on her arms, determined to keep her stomach from heaving and the world from spinning.

Someone approaches the table. Mina can't be that back early--the school's population was perpetually caffeine-deprived, and lines are always long. 

Sejeong lifts her head to see WINNER's bassist and arguably most recognizable member Song Mino looming over her, sipping what looks like apple juice. This isn't a mirage, is it?

Song Mino tilts his head. "Do you mind if I join your table? Everywhere's already full."

"Um, sure." She straightens up, making her head throb instantly

Song Mino sits across her. His aura is larger than life, even wearing the school's stiff, preppy uniform. It even seems to pervade her personal space from the other side of the table where she sat.

"I realize we haven't been introduced before." He raises his hand in greeting. "Song Mino."

All WINNER members are spectacularly, drop-dead gorgeous in their own unique way. Now that Kim Jinwoo and Lee Seunghoon left school, all the attention is now focused on the two remaining band members. The scrutiny on them has probably increased tenfold. Sejeong couldn't help but mentally compare them in her head. 

Song Mino's shaved head, perfect tan skin, sculpted features (that nose!), and lean body all screams dangerous. A bit of a tattoo peeks from the undone buttons of his polo. He's got that vibe that anyone couldn't help respond to--that kind of guy waiting on his motorcycle down the street for your daughter to crawl out her window.

Kang Seungyoon's elegant charms are honed to lure you in with a pretty smile, a playful pout, a knowing smirk. His wholesome, seraphic looks are tempered with his choice of rugged outfits (those full lips!). Distracting you with his pink hands and sparkling, dry wit. Until he suddenly switches up his intensity and blindsides you into wanting more of his company. 

Sejeong doesn't underestimate either of them: they're both equally dangerous.

Mino gives Sejeong a long look. It's sullen, almost. And Sejeong has absolutely no clue what she did to draw his ire.

"I heard Seungyoon sang for you yesterday," he says.

What an odd choice of words. "For my cousin's wedding, yes."

He continues to survey her with an unblinking stare. She can't look away. "He talks about you a lot."

"We're working together. Can't be helped."

"It's cool." Song Mino tilts his head, no trace of humor in his tone. "Just don't hurt Kang Seungyoon. Okay?"

Only the sheer will of Sejeong's strong discipline prevents her from bolting from the table. Her throat grasps for something to retort in confusion. Hurt Kang Seungyoon?

"What do you mean? We're just partners for the duet showcase."

He pauses as if considering her answer. Or perhaps the way she answered. Song Mino gives an indecipherable smile.

"You'll see."

To Sejeong's relief, Song Mino's stare slides to someone behind her shoulder.

She turns around and sees Kang Seungyoon carrying a brown paper bag, probably their lunch. His hair is slightly rumpled by the wind. He looks at Song Mino, then back at Sejeong. 

Something unspoken passes between the two boys. Maybe them sitting together is as strange to Seungyoon as to her?

Mino's expression switches gears, the storm clouds dissipating as he grins unapologetically at him. "Everywhere else is full."

Seungyoon shakes his head and saunters towards them, putting down the brown paper bag on the table. Song Mino reaches out for it, muttering. "Took you long enough.'

"The line was fucking long." Seungyoon takes a seat beside Sejeong and greets her. "Hello. Hope you don't mind us invading your table."

"Of course not. Invade away." She stills and silently groans. _ Invade away? Really? _

Seungyoon looks, talks, and acts the same. Sejeong anticipates that they might be a tad awkward the morning after (after all, they're not exactly friends, right?), but then again, why would they be any different? Yes, she enjoyed his company, but it was just one night of polite companionship, as a favor to her cousin.

Right? Right.

Seungyoon eyes her untouched lunch tray. "Bad appetite?"

"Aren't you even hungover?" She narrows her eyes at him.

"No." Seungyoon laughs, looking at her almost fondly. She commands herself not to fidget under that warm gaze. "Poor Sejeong."

Beside him, Song Mino looks at Seungyoon but says nothing.

Before Sejeong could reply, WINNER's band manager unceremoniously arrives at their table, dropping a thick folder on the seat beside Mino. He looks at them accusingly. "Thought you two abandoned me for lunch again somewhere without telling me."

Seungyoon and Mino both start to object, but the tall guy abruptly turns to Sejeong. He gives a polite, shallow bow. "Hello, God Sejeong. I'm Kwon Hyunjung, nice to meet you."

_ "Oh my god."  _

The three of them swivel to look at Mina, bearing two coffees. She looks shell-shocked. 

Sejeong thinks about what the scene looks like from an outside perspective: Mina leaves her, hungover and alone; now, she comes back to half of WINNER eating lunch with her. Mina must be so confused.

Well, Sejeong herself is confused about how this all transpired.

Seungyoon and Mino both turn up their megawatt smiles at her. Poor girl didn't stand a chance. 

Pretty soon, they're all chatting amiably. They have a few classes and friends in common. The boys are all incredibly charming, even Song Mino's earlier surly mood has morphed into sort-of-dorky humor that has them hooting with laughter.

"How are all your solo recital pieces going?" Hyunjung asks. "I heard Jeon Somi's cello practice this morning brought the house down."

"Oh? What's she performing?" Mina perks up.

"I heard she's attempting Britten," Hyunjung replies, shooting a look at Sejeong. "So now everyone's curious about God Sejeong has up her sleeve."

If one considers Sejeong having trouble executing a standard Three-Act Liszt lieder as something up her sleeve. She smiles mysteriously but opted not to say anything. 

At this point, she has half a mind to abandon Liebestraum and just play something in her comfort zone. 

But hearing Jeon Somi go for Britten lights a fire in her insides. Sejeong respects Jeon Somi's skill, and even though they aren't that close, they are quite amiable. It's just that the blasted teachers like pitting them, and sometimes it gets a little awkward between them.

Seungyoon chimes in, "What about your duet showcase? Having progress with your partners?"

Mino shrugs. "Started practicing last week. I don't particularly care for the arrangement, but it's enough to pass…"

As everyone discusses, Sejeong's phone keeps vibrating with notifications every few minutes. She taps the screen and sees more than a hundred notifications in her group chats, all madly asking her what she was doing hanging out with WINNER, and could they join their table too?

Mina notices Sejeong and laughs knowingly. "I know right? My phone's blowing up."

Seungyoon smiles curiously. "What is?"

"My phone is getting spammed with all sorts of questions why we're hanging out," Sejeong replies, sighing. "Seems like you all have lots of fans from my classes."

Kwon Hyunjung lifts his eyebrows in mock surprise. "Well, shit. Classical people do have taste."

Mina points at each of them. "God Sejeong. Kang Seungyoon. Song Mino. All eating in one table. You realize this is, like, officially the coolest spot right now in this school."

Sejeong takes a look around. Students are giving them covert looks. Well, with half of WINNER sitting on their table, people are bound to stare.

Hyunjung chimes in. "They're all thinking, what are two good and vanilla classical music students doing hanging out with us?"

"Hey, watch it," Mina rolls her eyes good-naturedly. "We're not as vanilla as you think. Sejeong just came home at 4 AM this morning with an epic hangover."

At the corner of her eye, Sejeong notices Mino's jaw tighten.

Hyunjung blinks at Sejeong before realizing what Mina is talking about. "Ah, the wedding. That was a sweet gig, it was nice of you to hook him up."

"It was him doing my cousin a huge favor. Everyone at the wedding loved him." Sejeong says.

Song Mino leans forward. "4 AM, huh. So how does the rich throw a wedding?"

"Same, same." Sejeong shrugs.

Mino persists in a light tone. "You all stayed at the venue until 4 AM for same-same?"

Seungyoon is weirdly quiet, to Sejeong's annoyance. She'd expected he'd be gleeful to retell of how inebriated she was last night.

"Well, yes. We drank, there was dancing--" on the balcony, with just the two of them, but she's not about to confess that "--we drank some more, he walked me to the car, and we both went home." She glances at Seungyoon, who looks expectant at something she'd about to say… and then thinks the better of it.

"Right." Seungyoon finally confirms.

Mina laughs mischievously. "I've given up getting details from her when she's drunk. She forgets everything."

Seungyoon mulls over this. "Is that right?"

"It's like alcohol-induced amnesia," Mina confirms gravely.

Sejeong protests. "But, that's just what happened last night. Don't think I've forgotten anything?"

"Nope. That's it." Seungyoon easily replies. 

Sejeong breathes a sigh of relief that she didn't do anything embarrassing. A slight discomfort niggles at her, like she said something wrong, but she chalks it up to her hangover.

Mina grins. "Wasn't she an adorable drunk?"

"Yeah, yeah." Sejeong glares at her friend.

Thankfully, they move on to other topics. Sejeong sneaks a look at Mino, remembering his mood earlier. Maybe she misinterpreted it?

Mino catches her staring, just for a second. She doesn't know what she expected to find. But it's certainly not a faded glint of something dark and unhappy glint in his eyes.

xxxx

Sejeong pushes the door of the small studio assigned to her and Seungyoon. She finds it dark and empty. She switches on the light and checks the clock. Well, she is earlier than usual. She plops down the narrow, probably filthy faux leather couch squeezed in this tiny room, grateful for little quiet time. 

She just came from Dr. Choi's one-on-one session. Miraculously, he didn't ask her to play Liebestraum but instead put her through other mild forms of torture. Chopin, Brahms, Ravel. Sejeong wonders if her old mentor also found out about Jeon Somi's magical rehearsal and is now upping the dial.

A massage is what she wants. A lovely hand massage or a scalp massage to ease her persistent headache, if anyone is taking requests. But since she can't have either, she rummages through her bag for her phone, pops in her Airpods, and scrolls down her music playlist. It's named Top Shelf, and it includes a mishmash of all songs she likes hearing when she's in a mood.

Half of the tracks in this playlist are from WINNER. 

Their music is so far removed from what she usually listens or plays. In short, WINNER's music is a welcome escape for her. Sejeong leans back on the couch, tilting her head back comfortably, and closes her eyes. Kang Seungyoon's impeccable vocals croon in her ears. Five minutes.

A dark cobblestone path with twinkle lights lighting the way rose in her mind.

Someone saying: Why are your hands so pink?

Later, another voice: I want to.

Don't hurt Kang Seungyoon.

A jolt wakes her up abruptly. Sejeong opens her eyes to see Kang Seungyoon's back to her, fiddling with his guitar. She yanks her Airpods off. How long has he been there? She rechecks the clock: it's just been ten minutes since she fell asleep. 

Seungyoon swivels himself on the chair to face her. "Oh, hey. You're awake."

"I didn't mean to fall asleep." Sejeong yawns. Her headache has abated somewhat. "Why didn't you wake me?"

He shrugs. "You looked like you needed a nap. Here." He hands her cold bottled water. 

"Oh. Thanks." She suddenly realizes she's thirsty. Her fingers uncap the bottle, and she takes a long drink.

"You listen to WINNER?"

Startled, Sejeong manages to swallow the water before answering. She clears her throat. "Pardon?"

He looks nonplussed. "Sorry, can't help but still overhear. The volume was kind of loud."

"Why do you look so surprised?"

Seungyoon shrugs. "Because it's… you?"

"What, again with my decrepit taste in music?" She widens her eyes in amusement. "I do enjoy your tracks. Haven't I mentioned it before?"

They both know… she hasn't. But wisely, he doesn't say anything.

Sejeong puts her Airpods away and joins him at the table. She looks up to see Seungyoon still watching her as if he sees something new.

"Have a favorite?" he asks this almost shyly, not looking at her now. He's twiddling his guitar's tuning pegs.

She pauses, deliberating. "It really depends on my mood. Lately, I like listening to Go Up."

"Why?" He still doesn't look at her.

"I suppose it's just a shamelessly positive song." She grins. "The energy and earnestness in that track is infectious. I often imagine that the writer must have such a healthy mindset--that he's the kind of person who won't just ever give up no matter what." He laughs aloud at this. Sejeong feels her cheeks warm. "There are just times you need something to remind you to smile again."

He shakes his head. "I made that song overnight. We needed one last track to complete our demo for this producer. He said some mean things about our tracklist and how we really didn't work as a band." Seungyoon smiles, lost in thought. "Maybe I made that song just to prove that producer wrong."

Sejeong gapes at him, "What happened? You're not signed with him, are you?"

"He begged to have the song, but we walked away from the deal." He says, a bit smug. "We're not in a hurry to get signed."

She laughs at his cocky, self-satisfied smile. He's so cute like this.

"Though to be frank," He curls his hand around his neck, gazing at her steadily. "To be in God Sejeong's playlist feels like a win to me."

She scoffs. "Control your ego, please. You're not the only musicians I listen to from this school."

He laughs aloud at her sharp remark, returning his attention to tuning his guitar.

"What's the agenda for today? Do we have a song yet?"

He strums his guitar once. "The agenda is for us to jam today,"

She blinks at him. "Excuse me?"

"Jam? I'm sure even you uppity lot know how to jam together, right?"

"Enough with the elitist jokes," She narrows his eyes at him. "I suppose you don't mean I'm going to drag my piano here, right?"

"You said your second instrument is voice."

She sits there, frozen. Kang Seungyoon really wants her to sing with him?

"But I don't--"

"You asked me to pick the songs. How will I know what to choose if I don't know how we synergize with each other?"

"We just played together yesterday!" She protests, voice heightening.

"That was a paid gig. And besides, you could do that in your sleep." He studies her seriously, "Don't you want to know what it's like to not be in your comfort zone?"

For Sejeong, not being in her comfort zone means switching her blue jeans to black jeans. Or changing her phone's wallpaper after six months. Not suddenly jamming with this school's arguably best--and hottest--vocalist. She couldn't make her throat work.

Seungyoon presses his advantage gently. The only indication of his intensity is his fingers tighten around the guitar's neck until his knuckles turn white.

"Sing with me, Kim Sejeong," he says. "Just try it once."

It should be easy to say no, but he wants this a lot, she can tell.

Seungyoon's eyes plead, Please.

She swallows her inhibitions. What the hell right. 

"One song." Her demand sounds like a question

"Just one." His tension seems to release at her slight consent. "Trust me."

"What do you want to play? I don't know a lot of songs."

His brows knit in concentration. "Do you know any Radiohead songs?"

"Oh shut up, you know I only know Creep."

Seungyoon laughs. "Then, let's play that." He adjusts the guitar again, pulling his chair closer to her. 

Sejeong swallows. Just the sight of his slender hand and long fingers moving along the frets, his forearms, makes her mouth dry. Seungyoon holding the guitar doesn't inspire any kind of professional thought in her head. Just the exact opposite.

She pulls the lyrics from her phone. Her heart is pounding.

He seems to notice this and flashes her a reassuring smile. "Relax. It's just me."

After a few minutes of working who will sing what part, they agree to begin. She can feel the sweat forming at the nape of her neck. He murmurs a purr of encouragement. "Have fun. Just let go."

She resists to shoot him a glare. Easy for you to say. Instead, she nods for him to start.

_ When you were here before _

_ Couldn't look you in the eye _

_ You're just like an angel _

_ Your skin makes me cry _

_ You float like a feather _

_ In a beautiful world _

_ I wish I was special _

_ You're so fuckin' special _

Watching Kang Seungyoon sing from a laptop screen was already potent. But listening to him sing no more than two feet away from her is ruin. 

Sejeong almost misses her cue to join the chorus. She starts wobbly, but Seungyoon's encouraging smile emboldens her.

_ But I'm a creep _

_ I'm a weirdo _

_ What the hell am I doing here? _

_ I don't belong here _

She gets the second verse. A wobbly start, but as Seungyoon gazes at her intently, a need to make him happy arises in her. He knows he's listening to her sing. Sejeong closes her eyes and thinks of the lyrics. She fantasizes saying these things out loud to everyone in her life.

_ I don't care if it hurts _

_ I wanna have control _

_ I want a perfect body _

_ I want a perfect soul _

Seungyoon joins her. She opens her eyes and watches him watch her as they harmonize. With a mild surprise, her soft, throaty tone matches well with his rich and raspy timbre. 

_ I want you to notice _

_ When I'm not around _

_ You're so fuckin' special _

_ I wish I was special _

At Sejeong's melodic utterance of a curse word, Seungyoon looks like he wants to hide a smile. That emboldens her. She starts to enjoy it.

Kang Seungyoon is a generous musician, letting Sejeong lead, encouraging her when she falters. There are times when he changes things subtly, and she's forced to adjust, but he does it with a mischievous glint in his eyes, one that she can't help but respond to. Singing with him is like dancing--they take turns to lead.

_ She's running out the door _

_ She's running out _

_ She run, run, run, run _

_ Run...  _

Sejeong grows bolder, and genuine emotions leak into her voice. Seungyoon answers this with matching intensity, their voices mingling perfectly, in sync like she never felt before. 

And then, he lets go. It's like watching a spectacular fireworks show, only it's just a boy singing his heart out in a tiny studio. Watching him in this kind of abandonment, Sejeong can't help but feel this is all so, so, so personal. What they're doing feels intimate. And she's helpless to stop it.

With fluid guitar strokes, he picks up the song's denouement, his voice absorbed greedily by Sejeong's bones.

  
  


_ Whatever makes you happy _

_ Whatever you want _

_ You're so fucking special _

_ I wish I was special _

  
  


The song ends. 

They stare at each other for a long while, a roar raging inside her head, as if she is coming down from a high. 

"Oh my god." Sejeong whispers, her hand covering her mouth.

"Yeah." He is incoherent. His face is openly raw. "Yeah."

Sejeong's fingers shake as she puts it down to her lap. "That was…" What was that?

He seems to hear her unspoken question. "It happens when we do good music. That was good music between us, Kim Sejeong."

She couldn't seem to put up her walls back, just not yet. Her brain wants to replay that feeling, over and over and over again. It's dangerously addicting, singing with Kang Seungyoon's kind of calibre.

"Sejeong," he says, his tone oddly serious. "Let's do a vocal duet for the showcase."

"What?" Her jaw drops. "No."

Seungyoon puts down his guitar, and suddenly hooks his leg to Sejeong's chair, drawing her closer to him. He places his hands on either side of the armrests, trapping her to him.

"What just happened between us when we sang, that's not usual." His face is so close to hers. She feels flayed open at this moment. "How can you say no, just like that?"

It's a reflex answer she admits, but the way he looks at her sounds the alarms in her head. 

"I would never make you feel stupid about singing with me. I have the highest respect for you and your artistry." He searches her face. "I'll always do my best by you, you must know that by now."

Sejeong calms herself. He just wants you as a musician, says a chiding voice inside her head.

Piano has always been a solitary activity. Her training had always fashioned her to be alone and contained. She'd always operated that way. This entire project was supposed to be almost transactional. Get-in, get-out.

And now this boy comes along and says he wants something more from her.

She wets her lips. Tries to talk. "I'm not saying yes."

He moves infinitesimally closer. "But you're not saying no."

"Let me think about it, at least." She bargains. "This was supposed to be just a jamming session after all."

"Last night," he starts, and Sejeong's forehead creases with confusion about the subject change, "Is it really just all you remember? Me walking to your car. That's it?"

"Yes." She could feel her flushed face. It must be emanating heat by now. "Is there anything else I should remember? I'm sorry for whatever I said or did."

He still doesn't look away. They stare at each other again.

She smiles weakly, "My father did warn you."

Whatever Seungyoon finds in her face, he relaxes, releasing his grip from the chair. He pulls away, and Sejeong can breathe properly again.

"That he did." He grins at her. "About the duet. Just… think about it, alright?" 

And it's back to the light, agreeable Kang Seungyoon. Like the intensity from the duet was just a figure of her imagination.

"I will." She promises. 

It's her turn to watch him. She thinks about the sunny boy she'd been working with for the past days, and the dangerous man who sang with her just now. 

Which is the real Kang Seungyoon?

Under her scrutiny, Seungyoon stands up abruptly and reaches for a paper bag. He hands it to her.

"Here are the suit and shoes. You sure you don't want me to foot the dry cleaning bill?"

His tone is brisk. Sejeong could almost give a sigh of relief, like she narrowly missed a train without working breaks hurtling on a track.

"No, we'll let the overpaid professor handle it himself." She peeks at the paper bag and reaches out to inspect the lapel. Her fingers touch the fabric.

"Anyway, it doesn't look too--"

Something unlocks in her brain without warning. Everything last night come rushing back at her.

The blazer drops back to the bag. 

Seungyoon looks back at her, concerned. "Hey, everything okay?"

No. Everything is not okay. Because Sejeong just remembered the events of last night.

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I will try my best to have a semi-regular update schedule after this. Once I wrap up IDILY (next in line for the finale update!) I should have more time to write more quickly.
> 
> If you're still reading, thank you so much for sticking with this story. Your reviews (even DMs sent to my Twitter!) are very much appreciated and bring a smile to my heart during these hard times. Hope you're all safe and happy. :)


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